What are the odds that I would crush on someone who does not even know me? And no, it's not some actor or some imaginary dude who is ultimately beyond our reach. Just a normal guy like all of us. Well it seems the odds are in favor with me considering that I crushed on somebody who doesn't know I exist. Honestly I didn't know how that happened. I just saw him and instantly all is butterflies and sunshine. It felt like OMG he's Mr Perfect. And that's how it began. I constantly thought about him, find out more things about him, even stalking him on facebook (yes, my obsession runs for miles but let's face it, everybody stalks everybody's facebook these days, don't deny it!). The funny thing is, I never had the nerve to get him to notice me or to declare my interest in him. I just feel like it will be impossible for a guy like that to have any interest in a girl like me (sounds cheesy but i'm not kidding) so I never gathered any courage to try and talk to him(I did say hello once, but ran away when he said hello back, WTH is wrong with me >.<) Then again I don't think I would be able to have any coherent conversation with him since I would be too nervous to think straight let alone converse. So my one-sided delusional crush goes on for sometime until I found out he's not single anymore recently. I wouldn't lie saying I got over him that instant and that I'm okay with it. But it's not as if I cried night and day knowing that fact. I just feel, well, what if I ignored my cowardice and just talk to him before, maybe things would have been different? Would there be any chances? Regrets, yes, that's what I experienced. Then again, I just think that it just wasn't meant to be. But one thing I learned from that experience is that life does not wait for chickens. If you have something to say, just say it. If the guy does not like you back, well, you will only be embarrassed and awkward for a few months and you can get over him without any doubts. If he does like you, kudos for you. If you never said anything, no one will know about it. This ain't some korean movie or fairy tale where the guy does everything and understands the fair lady's mind. Life is reality so get REAL. Don't be like Cinderella waiting for her shoe cause chances are, you will be walking with one barefoot for a long time and blisters ain't pretty, trust me. Be like Ariel who went to great lengths for someone she really like(but i'm not saying you should sacrifice your voice, be smart for God's sake). Be positive. Just because you can't drink the wine doesn't mean you can't appreciate the bouquet. Until now,seeing his smile still makes my heart beat faster and I would smile and be all spirited to find Mr Right which is more important than Mr Perfect. Okay, I'm done ranting and off I go to do my work. Adios.
Peace Out,
B.
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